Seeking The Girl's Permission

Abu Hurairah reported the Prophet ﷺ as saying “ A woman who has been previously married should not be married until her permission is asked nor should a virgin be married without her permission. “They (the people) asked “What is her permission, Apostle of Allah ﷺ? He replied “it is by her keeping silence.”

حَدَّثَنَا مُسْلِمُ بْنُ إِبْرَاهِيمَ، حَدَّثَنَا أَبَانُ، حَدَّثَنَا يَحْيَى، عَنْ أَبِي سَلَمَةَ، عَنْ أَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ، أَنَّ النَّبِيَّ ﷺ قَالَ " لاَ تُنْكَحُ الثَّيِّبُ حَتَّى تُسْتَأْمَرَ وَلاَ الْبِكْرُ إِلاَّ بِإِذْنِهَا " . قَالُوا يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ وَمَا إِذْنُهَا قَالَ " أَنْ تَسْكُتَ " .

Narrated Abu Hurairah:

The Prophet ﷺ said: An orphan virgin girl should be consulted about herself; if she says nothing that indicates her permission, but if she refuses, the authority of the guardian cannot be exercised against her will. The full information rest with the tradition narrated by Yazid.

Abu Dawud said: This tradition has also been transmitted in a similar way by Abu Khalid Sulaiman b. Hayyan and Mu'adh b. Mu'adh on the authority of Muhammad b. 'Amr.

حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو كَامِلٍ، حَدَّثَنَا يَزِيدُ يَعْنِي ابْنَ زُرَيْعٍ، ح وَحَدَّثَنَا مُوسَى بْنُ إِسْمَاعِيلَ، حَدَّثَنَا حَمَّادٌ، - الْمَعْنَى - حَدَّثَنِي مُحَمَّدُ بْنُ عَمْرٍو، حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو سَلَمَةَ، عَنْ أَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ، قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ ﷺ " تُسْتَأْمَرُ الْيَتِيمَةُ فِي نَفْسِهَا فَإِنْ سَكَتَتْ فَهُوَ إِذْنُهَا وَإِنْ أَبَتْ فَلاَ جَوَازَ عَلَيْهَا " . وَالإِخْبَارُ فِي حَدِيثِ يَزِيدَ . قَالَ أَبُو دَاوُدَ وَكَذَلِكَ رَوَاهُ أَبُو خَالِدٍ سُلَيْمَانُ بْنُ حَيَّانَ وَمُعَاذٌ عَنْ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ عَمْرٍو .

The aforesaid tradition has also been transmitted through a different chain of narrators by Muhammad bin ‘Amr. This version adds “If she weeps or keeps silence”. The narrator added the word “weeps”.

Abu Dawud said:

The word "weeps" is not guarded. This is a misunderstanding of the tradition on the part of the narrator Ibn Idris or Muhammad b. al-'Ata.

Abu Dawud said: This tradition has also been narrated by Abu 'Amr Dhakwan on the authority of 'Aishah who said: A virgin is ashamed of speaking, Messenger of Allah. He said: Her silence is her acceptance.

حَدَّثَنَا مُحَمَّدُ بْنُ الْعَلاَءِ، حَدَّثَنَا ابْنُ إِدْرِيسَ، عَنْ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ عَمْرٍو، بِهَذَا الْحَدِيثِ بِإِسْنَادِهِ زَادَ فِيهِ قَالَ " فَإِنْ بَكَتْ أَوْ سَكَتَتْ " . زَادَ " بَكَتْ " . قَالَ أَبُو دَاوُدَ وَلَيْسَ " بَكَتْ " . بِمَحْفُوظٍ وَهُوَ وَهَمٌ فِي الْحَدِيثِ الْوَهَمُ مِنِ ابْنِ إِدْرِيسَ أَوْ مِنْ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ الْعَلاَءِ . قَالَ أَبُو دَاوُدَ وَرَوَاهُ أَبُو عَمْرٍو ذَكْوَانُ عَنْ عَائِشَةَ قَالَتْ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ إِنَّ الْبِكْرَ تَسْتَحِي أَنْ تَتَكَلَّمَ . قَالَ " سُكَاتُهَا إِقْرَارُهَا " .