What Should A Woman Whose Husband Dies Avoid During Her Waiting Period ?
باب فِيمَا تَجْتَنِبُهُ الْمُعْتَدَّةُ فِي عِدَّتِهَا
Sunan Abu Dawood, Book of Divorce (Kitab Al-Talaq)(view book)
‘Umm Athiyah reported the Prophet ﷺ as saying “A woman must not observe mourning for more than three (days) except for four months and ten days in the case of a husband and she must not wear a dyed garment except one of the types made of dyed yarn or apply collyrium or touch perfume except for a little costus or azfar when she has been purified after her menstrual courses.
The narrator Ya’qub mentioned the words “except washed clothes” instead of the words “one of the types made of dyed yarn”. Ya’qub also added “She must not apply Henna”
حَدَّثَنَا يَعْقُوبُ بْنُ إِبْرَاهِيمَ الدَّوْرَقِيُّ، حَدَّثَنَا يَحْيَى بْنُ أَبِي بُكَيْرٍ، حَدَّثَنَا إِبْرَاهِيمُ بْنُ طَهْمَانَ، حَدَّثَنِي هِشَامُ بْنُ حَسَّانَ، ح وَحَدَّثَنَا عَبْدُ اللَّهِ بْنُ الْجَرَّاحِ الْقُهُسْتَانِيُّ، عَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ، - يَعْنِي ابْنَ بَكْرٍ - السَّهْمِيِّ عَنْ هِشَامٍ، - وَهَذَا لَفْظُ ابْنِ الْجَرَّاحِ - عَنْ حَفْصَةَ، عَنْ أُمِّ عَطِيَّةَ، أَنَّ النَّبِيَّ ﷺ قَالَ " لاَ تُحِدُّ الْمَرْأَةُ فَوْقَ ثَلاَثٍ إِلاَّ عَلَى زَوْجٍ فَإِنَّهَا تُحِدُّ عَلَيْهِ أَرْبَعَةَ أَشْهُرٍ وَعَشْرًا لاَ تَلْبَسُ ثَوْبًا مَصْبُوغًا إِلاَّ ثَوْبَ عَصْبٍ وَلاَ تَكْتَحِلُ وَلاَ تَمَسُّ طِيبًا إِلاَّ أَدْنَى طُهْرَتِهَا إِذَا طَهُرَتْ مِنْ مَحِيضِهَا بِنُبْذَةٍ مِنْ قُسْطٍ أَوْ أَظْفَارٍ " . قَالَ يَعْقُوبُ مَكَانَ عَصْبٍ " إِلاَّ مَغْسُولاً " . وَزَادَ يَعْقُوبُ " وَلاَ تَخْتَضِبُ " .
Classification
The tradition mentioned above has also been narrated by Al ‘Umm Athiyah from the Prophet ﷺ through a different chain of narrators. The tradition narrated by Yazid bin Harun from Hisham does perfectly correspond to the tradition transmitted by Ibrahim bin Tahman and ‘Abd Allah Al Shami from Hisham. The narrator Al Misma’I reported Yazid as saying “I do not know but that he said “she should not dye herself.” To this the narrator Harun added “She should not wear colored clothes except one of the types made of dyed yarn.”
حَدَّثَنَا هَارُونُ بْنُ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ، وَمَالِكُ بْنُ عَبْدِ الْوَاحِدِ الْمِسْمَعِيُّ، قَالاَ حَدَّثَنَا يَزِيدُ بْنُ هَارُونَ، عَنْ هِشَامٍ، عَنْ حَفْصَةَ، عَنْ أُمِّ عَطِيَّةَ، عَنِ النَّبِيِّ ﷺ بِهَذَا الْحَدِيثِ وَلَيْسَ فِي تَمَامِ حَدِيثِهِمَا . قَالَ الْمِسْمَعِيُّ قَالَ يَزِيدُ وَلاَ أَعْلَمُهُ إِلاَّ قَالَ فِيهِ " وَلاَ تَخْتَضِبُ " . وَزَادَ فِيهِ هَارُونُ " وَلاَ تَلْبَسُ ثَوْبًا مَصْبُوغًا إِلاَّ ثَوْبَ عَصْبٍ " .
Classification
Narrated Umm Salamah, Ummul Mu'minin:
The Prophet ﷺ said: A woman whose husband has died must not wear clothes dyed with safflower (usfur) or with red ochre (mishq) and ornaments. She must not apply henna and collyrium.
حَدَّثَنَا زُهَيْرُ بْنُ حَرْبٍ، حَدَّثَنَا يَحْيَى بْنُ أَبِي بُكَيْرٍ، حَدَّثَنَا إِبْرَاهِيمُ بْنُ طَهْمَانَ، حَدَّثَنِي بُدَيْلٌ، عَنِ الْحَسَنِ بْنِ مُسْلِمٍ، عَنْ صَفِيَّةَ بِنْتِ شَيْبَةَ، عَنْ أُمِّ سَلَمَةَ، زَوْجِ النَّبِيِّ ﷺ عَنِ النَّبِيِّ ﷺ أَنَّهُ قَالَ الْمُتَوَفَّى عَنْهَا زَوْجُهَا لاَ تَلْبَسُ الْمُعَصْفَرَ مِنَ الثِّيَابِ وَلاَ الْمُمَشَّقَةَ وَلاَ الْحُلِيَّ وَلاَ تَخْتَضِبُ وَلاَ تَكْتَحِلُ " .
Classification
Umm Hakim, daughter of Usayd, reported on the authority of her mother that her husband died and she was suffering from sore eyes. She therefore applied collyrium (jala'). Ahmad said:
The correct version is "glittering collyrium (kuhl al-jala'). She sent her slave-girl to Umm Salamah, and she asked her about the use of glittering collyrium (kuhl al-jala').
She said: Do not apply it except in the case of dire need which is troubling you. In that case you can use it at night, but you should remove it in the daytime. Then Umm Salamah said: The Messenger of Allah ﷺ came to visit me when AbuSalamah died, and I had put the juice of aloes in my eye.
He asked : What is this, Umm Salamah? I replied: It is only the juice of aloes and contains no perfume. He said: It gives the face a glow, so apply it only at night and remove it in daytime, and do not comb yourself with scent or henna, for it is a dye. I asked: What should I use when I comb myself, Messenger of Allah? He said: Use lote-tree leaves and smear your head copiously with them.
حَدَّثَنَا أَحْمَدُ بْنُ صَالِحٍ، حَدَّثَنَا ابْنُ وَهْبٍ، أَخْبَرَنِي مَخْرَمَةُ، عَنْ أَبِيهِ، قَالَ سَمِعْتُ الْمُغِيرَةَ بْنَ الضَّحَّاكِ، يَقُولُ أَخْبَرَتْنِي أُمُّ حَكِيمٍ بِنْتُ أُسَيْدٍ، عَنْ أُمِّهَا، أَنَّ زَوْجَهَا، تُوُفِّيَ وَكَانَتْ تَشْتَكِي عَيْنَيْهَا فَتَكْتَحِلُ بِالْجَلاَءِ - قَالَ أَحْمَدُ الصَّوَابُ بِكُحْلِ الْجَلاَءِ - فَأَرْسَلَتْ مَوْلاَةً لَهَا إِلَى أُمِّ سَلَمَةَ فَسَأَلَتْهَا عَنْ كُحْلِ الْجَلاَءِ فَقَالَتْ لاَ تَكْتَحِلِي بِهِ إِلاَّ مِنْ أَمْرٍ لاَ بُدَّ مِنْهُ يَشْتَدُّ عَلَيْكِ فَتَكْتَحِلِينَ بِاللَّيْلِ وَتَمْسَحِينَهُ بِالنَّهَارِ . ثُمَّ قَالَتْ عِنْدَ ذَلِكَ أُمُّ سَلَمَةَ دَخَلَ عَلَىَّ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ ﷺ حِينَ تُوُفِّيَ أَبُو سَلَمَةَ وَقَدْ جَعَلْتُ عَلَى عَيْنِي صَبِرًا فَقَالَ " مَا هَذَا يَا أُمَّ سَلَمَةَ " . فَقُلْتُ إِنَّمَا هُوَ صَبِرٌ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ لَيْسَ فِيهِ طِيبٌ . قَالَ " إِنَّهُ يَشُبُّ الْوَجْهَ فَلاَ تَجْعَلِيهِ إِلاَّ بِاللَّيْلِ وَتَنْزِعِينَهُ بِالنَّهَارِ وَلاَ تَمْتَشِطِي بِالطِّيبِ وَلاَ بِالْحِنَّاءِ فَإِنَّهُ خِضَابٌ " . قَالَتْ قُلْتُ بِأَىِّ شَىْءٍ أَمْتَشِطُ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ قَالَ " بِالسِّدْرِ تُغَلِّفِينَ بِهِ رَأْسَكِ " .